Doh

So I was looking through my old posts thanks to Messi who wanted to read some of my short stories!

Its so weird how I'd forgotten what I've written in the past. Like I'd read this random emo post with a message hidden in between the lines and I couldn't for the life of me remember what was going on in between the lines! Gee, to think that all these things are but 4-5 years away. It is quite disturbing really what you forget in the span of 5 years.

Now that its raining and quiet at home I finally get some time to play piano (albeit being a terrible amateur) and think about things. Well as is always the case, I kinda came to the conclusion that I was stupid to have done and said certain things that were better left unsaid because the circumstances were just too screwed up anyway. Well I can't take back whatever's been said and done right? So I told myself I'd do my best to right the wrong and hopefully make things better. Nobody can get through life without making a mistake, and this would probably seem so trivial in like 1-2 years when hopefully I come back and reread this post.

Message for the future me: Jo you know you have always been trying your best in life, to be a good friend, good son, good brother good student, good athlete, good whatever; and there is no reason for you to stop trying because what you have is precious. I hope you haven't changed too much in that aspect (: It doesn't matter what negative things people say about you, you're simply trying your best in life to be your true self. You might feel low sometimes, feel like there's no way out, feel like nobody cares, but those feelings are lies you will get through. Live through every now with conviction!

ISAZHYFMALH.

Within a month, I'd probably will forget what that thing stands for anyway.

Living Alone

Just had a chat with Yeri today. He's all alone in Jakarta now, and it will be so for a few years to come.

He's feeling... Sad. Obviously. Staring at the ceiling and thinking about the fragility of life. People do that a lot when they're alone and have nothing to do. Well at least I do. Been home alone for a few days myself... I can't think what Mum has to go through every single day we go to school and only return at night. She definitely deserves more than that.

It scares me, these few days alone. Scares me a lot.

One day, when I have to leave everyone to chase my dreams.

Will I be strong enough to hold on?

If 2 days alone can amount to an emotional roller coaster (my fault, really),

What can 3 years do?

I have to be strong.

Only then will Mum and Dad be able to let me go without worrying too much.

For now, I'll keep trying to live my life the best I can.

RAWR.

Ah.

And again a long punctuation from updating ensues. Haven't written much in my journal either. I guess that's kind of like the university effect. You really lose time when you're in university (how about an extra 2 and a half hours a day in travelling?), and somehow the activities take up more of your day (because mornings are usually spent sleeping- lessons are mostly in the afternoon). Now guess what, my update comes right in the middle of the exam period. Pretty much the only time when I'm really free this semester. Weird.

Experiencing this thing that has been a continuously recurring perspective- that some things can only be learnt by getting older. Maybe you're 20 now, maybe 16. I don't care how old you are, but look at the past year, maybe two or three. You're definitely a different person somehow. Can't escape it, but age brings with it additional opportunities (I refrain from using the word 'risk') that cannot be gained any way else.

These opportunities can come in the form of a shift in perspective (what they call maturity), a fateful moment (or critical moment, depending on which framework you fall under), or maybe just the increased exposure to peers who are very much different. No longer are you able to stick much with those of your 'kind', but you are unknowingly thrown into this sea of weak ties so ephemeral I think a goldfish's memory might last longer.

Well, talking about the strength of weak ties, I would like to propose a refinement of the theory. Not only will weak ties bring about more opportunities, it will too bring about increased risk. My proof? Just look at where our type zero community is heading (thanks Dr. Kaku). Exposure this, exposure that, social media and all that comes with it; online communities are bringing about a revolution (if it isn't here yet- unlikely) that will place its emphasis on the seasonal vanity imposed on modern humanity, yet another temporary tool of adaptation in the concrete jungle unnecessary for human subsistence. Capitalism sure does a hell lot for humanity. To humanity, rather.

I knew I was meant to be born a farmer. Always loved the countryside. Even better, maybe I can have my own ballpark in the backyard. Or maybe in the corn fields, like the one I visualised somewhere in distant memory. It'd be swell. Then maybe I'd have been leading the life with conditions even royalty would be envious of (if they could see the value in it).

Then of course, lame fantasizing has no utility to the present. Love your life as it is now, and make every moment you have a conscious one.

After NM to-morrow, let's see what life's got in store for me (other than Cliff Lee's start).

父の誕生日と日本人大会

日本語は難しいですね…今週のテストはまだ勉強が、分かりません今週いつ勉強します。絶対にKOですよ…

大学生の生活は多忙だ！でも、先週はとても面白いですよ。三月六日（土）父の誕生日ですが、母と私はいっしょにバタムへ行きました。父もう五十八歳ですね…時間は動くことで速い！も二年は六十歳ね。今父も忙しいだ、それからバタムの学校は全部に父の責任！五十八歳多忙の生命難しいね…

先週の日曜日はタワーズと今年第一の日本人大会、も岡田さん最後の大会です。それではタワーズQチーム優勝！十一月の日本人会大会、十二月のファストピッチ大会、そして今回の日本人会大会、タワーズが三連覇！タワーズはシンガポール第一の三連覇の日本人チームですか？とてもすばらしい！昨日の大会はQチームすごいよ。チームのバッチング毎試合平均六点です、ヂィフェンスは毎試合一点。すごいのスコア、すばらしいの大会ですよ。

第一の試合はジャンがルーベアズ、得点は九対零。
第二の試合はNYK、得点は四対零。
第三の試合はNMR、全然恐いの試合ですよ。NMRの一番バッタJACKはすばらしいホームランですが、試合始めるNMR第一のバッチングは本当にプレッシャですね！でも、最後の得点は四対一です。
最後の試合はあぶさんAチーム、「No problem」ですよ。皆さんのバッチングはすごいね。最後の得点は七対一です。

日本人大会はタワーズ優勝!　島本さんコーチのシーニア子供チームイガルファイヴも優勝ですよ。

日曜日はとても楽しい一日！次のゲームは頑張りましょう！

CNY

Well, well. It feels like I've been posting a lot from airports nowadays. Oh man. I really travel quite a bit nowadays.

Well anyway, its Chinese New Year this time, and I'm currently in Changi Airport Terminal One waiting for my plane to Jakarta. I will be away until Tuesday, so yeah. Still contactable on my Singapore number.

To all of you reading this, well. Have an awesome Chinese New Year! We only get these festivities once a year, up to a maximum of a hundred or so in our lifetime. That's not a lot, once you come to think about it. Make the best out of it and have an awesome awesome week (:

Take care everyone!

Chiang Mai Open 2009

Was played in 2010. For the loss.

Haha so it was my fourth time there, and this time its with the NUS team. It was fun! Like, really really fun. Maybe its because its the first time I'm on an overseas trip without any 'adult supervision'. It kinda makes a difference to the mood you know, whether you're living in fear of doing something wrong or not! Come on, look at how restricted the Raffles team were! It was one of those times that I really felt free for a period as long as a week. Plus, we won the tournament! How cool is that. Haha. Even though the opponents were not so much of a challenge.

Anyway, I brought my camera but I didn't really take pictures, which was kinda wasteful, but I really immersed myself in the experience, which was awesomely awesome. Haha. I got the videos of the fireworks though! Will post those up on facebook soon. Lessons have started now and I really feel like Chiang Mai was nothing more than a dream, but apparently it wasn't because I can clearly remember whatever happened there, along with the pictures to back them up! Hurrah we should like go again this year and have fun again!

It all started kinda weirdly terrible though because the dumb airplane was delayed by 2 hours! Because there was something wrong with the wing apparently, so in the end everyone was stuffed onto the same plane from Bangkok to Chiang Mai! BUT it wouldn't have made a difference anyway because I was stuffed at the back of the plane with some thai guy even though I was the first batch to be on that plane! Grr! Discrimination! Anyway every single flight I took on this trip I sat alone, except for the first flight I sat with kiam, and we watched House season 6 episode 1. It was nice! Maybe I should watch the other seasons too.

We stayed at Holiday Garden Hotel, which was actually REALLY crowded. Now, that's not too good because there were really a lot of people at breakfasts, but it was also good because the HK team was also staying at the same hotel!! Awesome. Haha.

They're like all really tall, and almost all of them have the same body type (lanky blabla) so they're naturally going to be good at softball I guess. Which is why their pitching style works for them! They can afford to hold their weight back because they have the circumference enough to attack fast enough. Which is why their method would probably not work, unless I have a full instructional under Mr. Johnny for at least 2 months. So for now, the ideas are stored, but the possibility of changing style is definitely a zero.

And so it was, that we busted through every single one of our matches hitting like crazy. It really is funny how NUS guys can only hit well in real games, but I'm not complaining. The bitter truth, however, is that we will be completely wiped out once we meet a team with a good pitcher. Our only scoring tool in the whole Chiang Mai Open was hit-dependent, and that will be terribly difficult to reproduce once we face a good pitcher. Oh well. Anyway we were champions! Hurrah. We should get more subsidy this year!

Enough of the softball serious-y stuff! One of the most interesting things I did through the whole tournament was to hang on the back almost every single trip! It was awesome awesome. I can only recall the awesome feeling as we tumbled downhill, round and round, through the mountain roads. The wind was SO refreshing and so surreal now that I look back. Ah. I miss that a lot. What with Singapore weather the way it is right now. Another interesting thing that I did would be all the night training sessions with Eric. Well even though he forgot most of the stuff he learnt then, it was still a good practise for me in teaching the details of batting. Or maybe it helped that he's an engineering student. At any rate, it was the case that I could teach him quite nicely, but I couldn't practise much of what I preached because I know I was too preoccupied with trying too hard that i forgot just what batting was all about. Well, too bad I guess. There's always next year. I'll be all relaxed and ready to kick butt.

And there was the temple. Actually it was quite a nice place but all I could be bothered with was the food there. HAHA. So awesome. There was the corn, the 100% orange juice, the waffle, the nice view of chiang mai, and the nice coconut. Oh and the rainbow ice creams! There's proof of that :D Tumble, tumble, tumble, and we would all go to Thai Kitchen for the next serving of pad thai and pork knuckles (which I got terribly sick of) before whatever's next on the schedule. The good life. $4 meals to fill even a hungry bear's stomach.

Oh and Eric got whacked in the face and fractured a bit of his nose (don't forget his super speedy recovery from the hit, and the literally bloody "I'm okay, I'm okay"), and managed to get a 200 baht x-ray? Oh GOSH I would love to have a good x-ray check, given that it costed only $8. Bummer. Waffles. HAHA almost every night we would go for waffles! 7-eleven, too. Retail therapy session with roommate Eric! We spend like 450 baht on a single receipt which was like 53804923 metres long when it got printed out. Plus we got like 52431423 promotional stickers! Woohoo. I kinda understand the whole theory behind retail therapy now I think. It felt SO good. Of course, the night market at walking street was so much nicer an experience (even though I didn't buy much). That was the first time I walked around with aunty sanny! It was quite fun, and really funny too. In the end we opted to stay in the market longer because we couldn't get enough of it! Hawhaw. Walking street was great :D and I won't forget the popsicles, coconut ice cream, mango with sticky rice (thanks jiaqian! :D), and the amazing race feeling as we raced down the street at the rate which stalls were closing down and trying to do some shopping before they really closed. Now I look back at it and boy were we lucky the stalls didn't close earlier!

On New Year's day we played FIREWORKS hurrah! I want to play again! It was just really awesome, especially when we saw the myriads of lanterns being let go from another venue. It really lined the sky so nicely. Tried to take a picture of it, and got some pretty decent ones. One thing's for sure though, nothing will ever match seeing the real thing with your own eyes! Lanterns and fireworks were everywhere in the sky. How awesome!

We played paintball too! It was the first time I ever played paintball. I had 2 kills! I don't know who (no one owned up) but it was really fun. Maybe we'll get to play again soon. Next trip we should just dump the guy with the most strikeouts on the bungee and we can all have a good laugh :D

Oh gosh I can't quite remember what else we did over in Chiang Mai. There were really just too many things o.O maybe I'll even write another post if I have the time.

Unlikely. HAHA. I'll update again soon! Its week 4 of school ohmygosh.